Thursday, November 6, 2008

i shoulda just stayed home

Reasons my trip to the store was a virtual buffet of annoyances:

1) A Christmas tree in the entrance. Jingle Bells playing overhead. A whole display of Glade in holiday scents like gingerbread and candy cane. It's November 6. I'm still snacking on Halloween candy! Can't we just give the turkey his time to shine? Poor overlooked turkey.

2) A fanny pack. On a guy. AKA a manny pack. Unless you're in the 6th grade and at Disney World- where I wore with pride my super cool neon nylon fanny pack in 1992- how else would I carry my disposable camera, scrunchie, and Lisa Frank pen for autographs?- a fanny pack is just inexusable. Plus, it's just a super unattractive place to carry extra weight.

3) Whose bright idea was it to put the ramen NOODLES over by the soup? I spent a good 10 minutes examining the pasta aisle, box by box. No luck. Checked out the Asian food section, no avail. Gave up and went in search of chicken noodle soup instead- voila. My ramen, stuck there between the Campells and Progresso. But for $1.20 for a 12 meals, I guess I'll deal with the misplacement.

4) Feeding baby, then strapping in Baby Bjorn = a nice calm quiet sleepy baby at the store. However, it also = bouncing baby to and fro with a tummy full of milk.....and a big spit up explosion down his shirt, down my shirt, and all over our Baby Bjorn. Aaahhh, the lovely scent of baby barf. But I must add how sweetly good natured Anderson was about the mess. Instead of screaming after said explosion, he just rolled with it, and grinned up at me, looking mighty proud of his spit up moustache and beard. Did I mention this was the FIRST time I went into the store without a diaper bag? I really wanted to carry my purse. It's cute, and I miss it. It's also lacking a burp cloth, wet wipe, or anything suitable for wiping a spit up explosion. The Macy's receipt I tried to make do with didn't quite cut it. Lesson learned, stick to the diaper bag, no matter how short the errand. (My shirt cleaned his face just fine, but made me feel like I'd sunk to a whole new level of icky-ness.)

5) And as a final piece de resistance: what, exactly, about a petite woman carrying a tiny baby on her frontside and pushing a wobbly wheeled cart full of bags says "crosswalks are to be ignored" and/or "floor it and pretend you don't see her"? Rudeness. I feel it necessary to point out said rude-guy was driving a car with Oklahoma plates. Because we all know Texans drive friendly, unlike our neighbors to el norte.

Honestly. If my cat hadn't really, really needed his anxiety medication refilled, I'd have run screaming when I saw the Christmas tree.

1 comment:

Monica @ Writer Chic said...

I coulda told you not to leave home without the bag. Lesson learned, my friend. ;)