So here's what's going on this Wednesday, tidbit style because that's what I have the time and mental capacity to string together, okay?
Stuff my puppy ate/mauled during my half hour conference call: catnip cat toy, dryer sheet, cough drop wrapper, tampon (unused), hair roller. He's an unstoppable beast lately.
30 Day Shred. Doing it. On day 3. Hasta la NEVER, muffin top.
Cheese curds. All I can think about while Shredding. I want cheese curds. Smothered in ranch.
Christmas cards. Out. Not glittered or crafty, but done. Whoop!
Cold. Oh so inhumanely old.
Teen Mom 2. Last night. Kind of ho-hum, no? I mean, Barbarasaurus did her best, but if you read UsWeekly you already know how this whole season is going to play out. At least there's always the IBBB recap to live for!
Vivian is in mega diva mode this week. All she wants to wear is her favorite pair of pink pony fleecy pajamas and two long strands of pink (play) pearls. I mean, at least she's accessorizing creatively but hello, not going to work for the gym day care (read: the only public place we've gone this week) because a) you can't wear shoes with footie pajamas and b) choking hazards likesuchas long strands of pearls are frowned upon at the gym day care (party poopers). Removal of these items is punishable by a half hour of kicking and screaming and wrestling her into her car seat WWF style and Anderson covering his ears all the way to the gym daycare yelling "NO! BUBBITA! TOO LOUD HURTINGMYEARS! NO! BUBBITA! TOOLOUD!" So peaceful and doesn't make me want to drop them both off at Goodwill and go hide in a coffee shop AT ALL.
((Stop reading now if you're not the parent of a toddler, have an aversion to poop, or are eating or drinking anything you want to enjoy.))
Poop. OMG, the poop. I put the poo-smack down on Bug. Remember how he pee trained in, like, a day back in September? A single easy-peasy day, and done. Maybe four pee accidents since then. Yay for Anderson, awesomes. Not as awesomes? The Poop. Gawd, you guys, the poop drama. He went a few times on the potty that first week of no-diapers, and has not pooped even ONCE on the potty since then. He doesn't do it in his pants, either, thank my lucky stars. What possible pooping options remain, you ask? A diaper, duh. Why not just NOT give him a diaper? Oh, well well well. Do you know what happens when I withhold the diaper he begs me for come big-job time? He just won't shit. For DAYS. He'll go into his sister's room, grab a diaper, then roll around on the floor wailing when I refuse to stick it on him. He'll just hold it and hold it until he's got a five pound poo-baby sticking out his belly and he's crying in pain. After a few failed attempts to encourage him along (bribery, DVD in the bathroom, potty chair in the room of his choice, etc.), we just went with the diaper poos for awhile. He'd eat his lunch, he'd start in about needing a diaper, and I'd put one on him because hello, that's nap time and mama needs nap time and he figured out the pee on his own, so surely he'd give up on the poo-stand-off sooner or later. But over the weekend J and I had a poopie-pow-wow and agreed enough was enough already, he's 3.25 now, he understands the potty concept, we're being enablers. So no diaper on demand since then. He does require a diaper for overnight sleep, and did fill that one right on up with a special surprise the first morning .... but nothing since. And his naps the past few days, now that he's not relieving himself of the post-lunch pre-nap poo? Suckville. Yesterday he slept an hour, then woke crying for a diaper. Today, same. He's up there waiting for green light time talking to his teddy about what an evil monster his mommy is, I'm sure, but I'm standing my ground here. Or should I not be? I was pretty hands-off with the pee and it happened on its own .... but I'm starting to fear he'd be happy crapping in a diaper forever. What do I DO, people?
Is it summer yet?
4 hours ago