Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Okay, okay. So pulling the plug on my blog with no warning was maybe not so much a good idea. Sorry. Especially sorry if anyone thought I'd had to join the witness protection program or that I'd died or that maybe I'd ODd on nonfat vanilla lattes THEN died. I did not. What I did do, or really what I've done off and on for some time now, is pondered the future of my little blog. And really, pondering blogs in general. Occasionally coming across articles like this that gave me pause. Seeing some major mommy bloggers make some major (and unapologetic!) blunders at the expense of the children they're tasked with protecting at all costs. Not naming any names. Cough cough Nellagate cough cough. And because sometimes I'm a wee bit impetuous, with all this clutter in my head and concerns in my heart, I just shut 'er down. But then some of you were like 'OMG WHAT THE FUH?" and I was like "oops". So, hi. Here I am. Contemplative.
I started out as a blogger during the sad years before the babies happened. It was free therapy and it introduced me to other ladies with similar struggles and I like to think it maybe helped a few other sad, wishful-mothers to have hope in the darkest of their own hard days. I moved and revamped after the first baby, with tales of his firsts and sleep woes and 'doh moments of this first time mom. It kept my far off family and friends in the loop and again, it introduced me to other mamas in the same walk of life, and again with the free therapy perk. And on days when I felt like all I'd done was clean butts and read books full of animal sounds and rhyming words, it gave me a way to exercise my brain a little. I've always loved writing. (My third grade teacher said I was good at it, yall!) I've kept up with the blogging (with varying diligence) for four and a half years, three states, a few more babies, a .... uh, a bunch more cats (I DAMN LOST COUNT OF THE CATS!) Lately, I've been putting some thought into my future here. My kids are getting bigger. Particularly, the big one. He's in school. He gets shy sometimes. He's no longer a tiny little human without specific will or want, he's a thinking, feeling, person. Who deserves privacy and respect. And while I do think I've done a decent (IDK?) job of not getting TOO personal, not getting TOO embarrassing, and while I do think I'd love a written account of my childhood and those of my siblings .... I do sometimes wonder about the implications of sharing my kids' lives on the web. You know? All I really know is that all that really matters is doing right by those three little ones up top. And I just need some time to think that through, I guess. In between wiping hineys and reading animal sound books.
Weigh in, will ya? I know there's many a mommy blogger in my reading audience (of 10). I value your input.